To Waylon and old timers

[graze]

I don't know if any of yall will remember me. Was known then as Grazer. But I spent many years here. I fought for custody and won. I had two children and one had severe medical problems. Anyways, that has been many years ago. Just want to stop by and give an update. And encourage other non-custodial fathers not to give up.

Won primary physical custody of my daughter and son. Apox. 5 year battle. Daughter was 16yrs old and son was 13yrs old when I won. Daughter is now 24yrs old and in her 2nd year of medical school. Owns her own house and is still single. Has a limited relationship with her mother my ex. Son had a brain tumor, suffered a stroke and is paralyzed right side. Son when came to live with me and his step-mom was enrolled in a small private school locally. He was main schooled (no special ed) and participated in his High School marching band. Played the big bass drum one handed. Graduated high school 15th in his graduating class of 32. Received a scholarship to a local community college to play in their marching band and is presently in his 2nd year and has 2.85 grade point average. He plans on going to a major university and majoring in secondary education and then plans on enrolling in a seminary and wants to be a youth minister. He has a more relationship with his mother/my ex than his sister. My ex/their mother I believe blames my daughter for her loosing custody to me.

Anyways, long story short, main thing I learned thru my troubles, is never ever give up! Listen to what others here tell you. Stay totally involved as much as possible in your children. And always document everything, even the smallest things. Don't put your faith into just one lawyer. If you feel your lawyer is not fighting for you and just going thru the motions, fire him and find another. I went thru 4 or 5 before I found one that would actually stand up fight.

I feel sorry for all the persons that are faced with these awful problems. It is a damn long road. But one worth fighting.

Peace be with you,
Grazer

ps, thanks Waylon and all the others that listened, shared, gave encouragement and advice. REALLY

[Kitty C.]

Grazer!!!!!!!!  It's good to hear from you, buddy!  And it's absolutely fantastic to hear how well your kids are doing!
 
As for your ex's 'opinion' on why she lost custody...........well, like they say 'Opinions are like a**holes, everybody's got one.'  And what she thinks is unimportant and insignificant....all you have to do is look at your kids and what they've become to know her 'opinion' means exactly crap!
 
I just LOVE hearing about success stories!!!!!!!!!! 

[Waylon]

Grazer,

It's good to hear from you and I'm glad you're doing well!  Your children are very, very lucky to have you in their lives, both now and before.

Please don't be a stranger...I'm sure many people here could benefit from a word or two from you. You've been through more than most (and have probably forgotten more than most of us ever learned). 

-Waylon

I don't know if any of yall will remember me. Was known then as Grazer. But I spent many years here. I fought for custody and won. I had two children and one had severe medical problems. Anyways, that has been many years ago. Just want to stop by and give an update. And encourage other non-custodial fathers not to give up.

Won primary physical custody of my daughter and son. Apox. 5 year battle. Daughter was 16yrs old and son was 13yrs old when I won. Daughter is now 24yrs old and in her 2nd year of medical school. Owns her own house and is still single. Has a limited relationship with her mother my ex. Son had a brain tumor, suffered a stroke and is paralyzed right side. Son when came to live with me and his step-mom was enrolled in a small private school locally. He was main schooled (no special ed) and participated in his High School marching band. Played the big bass drum one handed. Graduated high school 15th in his graduating class of 32. Received a scholarship to a local community college to play in their marching band and is presently in his 2nd year and has 2.85 grade point average. He plans on going to a major university and majoring in secondary education and then plans on enrolling in a seminary and wants to be a youth minister. He has a more relationship with his mother/my ex than his sister. My ex/their mother I believe blames my daughter for her loosing custody to me.

Anyways, long story short, main thing I learned thru my troubles, is never ever give up! Listen to what others here tell you. Stay totally involved as much as possible in your children. And always document everything, even the smallest things. Don't put your faith into just one lawyer. If you feel your lawyer is not fighting for you and just going thru the motions, fire him and find another. I went thru 4 or 5 before I found one that would actually stand up fight.

I feel sorry for all the persons that are faced with these awful problems. It is a damn long road. But one worth fighting.

Peace be with you,
Grazer

ps, thanks Waylon and all the others that listened, shared, gave encouragement and advice. REALLY

[MixedBag]

Good to see you too!
 
And what HE said!

[graze]

Wow, Hey mixedbag! long time since I've heard that name. You doing ok?

[MixedBag]

Yes....in a nutshell, k?
 
OD was married, divorce (helped her do that), and I have 2 beautiful grandbaby girls with another baby due in August.  Better graduate college in 18 months!
 
MD married, gonna get divorced, no kids, gonna graduate college this spring.
 
Son, came for 2 years, fell in lust, went back, and now said he'll be back after high school graduation this semester for a technical trade school.  (Yipee!)
 
EX#3 let his job get to his head (police officer), and so he was fired by me a few years ago to go be with his girlfriend -- whom NO ONE likes.
 
SO...I still have 3 steps who keep in touch.
 
Awesome BF so time will tell where that takes us.
 
Still trying to help folks with the same ole stuff, different parents....
 
What's it been now, 15 years here?

[Kitty C.]

MB, I can tell you almost exactly to the day when I started here.  DH and I had just moved to where we're at now and had just gotten internet service.  And he was having major issues with the PBFH (at least she certainly was then!).  And we moved in here just before Thanksgiving in 1997.  So for me, it's been just over 13 years!  And I KNOW you'd been here a while by then!
 
So kick me if you don't want me to tell! 

[graze]

Yes mixedbag it's been a long time, I'm remarried=12yrs, I have 3 step and they are all married and living on their own. I have 2 grand babies, that I just adore! And they live nearby so we get to see them on a regular basis. Yesterday, I got to go see son participate in a band competition at his Community College. It was really good! Anyways, yall take care and I'll attempt to check in regularly.

[msme]

Grazer, good to hear things are going well for you. I still wander in from time to time. Same problems, just with pbfh & youngest now.
Take care, msme

[Ref]

Wow! It is like a reunion coming back here. I just came to add an update on my 20 yo SD on the Stepparent's board. I wish mine had as good of an ending as yours. Congratulations! I am so happy for you and your family!!!