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SPARC Forums  |   Main Forums  |  Dear Socrateaser (Moderators: Kitty C., olanna, Buff)  |  Topic: She is cohearsing my 6 year old son to lie « previous next »
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BeyondDriven
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« on: Nov 05, 2009, 06:42:56 am »

 My soon to be ex wife has temp custody of our son due to her filing a tpo. The judge gave me phone visitation rights. For the last 4 weeks, since i began talking to him his mother has been having him lie to me on the phone.  i have asked him every nite how school was today, what he learned,what he did on recess, what he did in his before and after school program.

I would hear him wispering and hear her wispering back. He would tell me everything he did. I found out he had been out of school for 3 weeks on break, and she put him in a church school while on break. I asked my son why he had lied to me, and his mom yelled in the background that "they chose to lie to me", then asked if i was on speaker phone.

I said to my son, please take me off speakerphone. she again yelled in the background " no, the judge said i can listen to your phone calls" I said no, the judge never said that, and to please take me off speaker phone. she refused. I then told my sone i loved and missed him and that i was getting off the phone now. Can she be cohearsing him to lie? Is this ok? And is she aloud to listen to my phone calls? Shouldnt these be private conversations between my son and i? Please help!! Sad
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DadsCrushed
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« Reply #1 on: Dec 01, 2009, 11:03:50 am »

My ex psycho pulled and continues to pull this stunt. She has the children sit in her lap so she can hear them or puts me on the speaker phone.
 
You are entitled pursuant to federal and state statutes certain privacy on the phone. I believe there is a link on this website that provides for each state and the level of consent for somebody to listen to your conversations.
 
Document the phone calls and the conversation. What helped me is when my ex claimed I molested my children social services came in and talked to my daughter. Molestation was thrown out but during the "interview" my daughter stated that "mommy is not fair" to daddy on the phone. The judge was pretty pissed with this interference from the "mother".
 
Also, your 6 year old is more resiliant then you think. My daughter the same age as your son used to sneak out of her bed and call me at night. If I wasn't there she would leave a message on the voice mail and that is admissible since leaving a message on the phone it is understood that it is recorded. This was also disclosed at Court.
 
My advice to you is try to have the phone call. I know it is hard but they need to hear your voice. Your TPO will be over soon and see your child.
 
 
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snowrose
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« Reply #2 on: Dec 01, 2009, 04:01:37 pm »

I wouldn't be surprised if this continues to happen, even after the divorce.  I'd suggest you get ahead of the game and start filing some papers that are very specific about what kind of visitation and telephone access you want.
 
Your ex is being pretty aggressive with her tactics, so you might want to keep as much control as you can with filing paperwork.
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