Visitation and Deployment

[Stats]

Stats

[rolo2302]

I've been talking to the lawyer about all this. Seems like they are going with a contempt of court and make up time. Which is good I'm happy to at least hear that from the lawyer. So I know it's a start and I'm sure in the end I will get some where with all this and hopefully I can get a change of custody from all this in the end. I just feel that I'm the most responsible one in this whole situation. Seems like the ex wants me out of the children's lives and it shouldn't be that way.

[ocean]

You would need to come home and her keep denying visits over and over and the judge get sick of her. You will not get a change in custody over this ...but you should def get make-up time when you get back for the missed visits and contempt for not allowing access when you are deployed. BUT there is no real punishment for contempt.

[rolo2302]

I guess I just need to do what I need to do and take it slow and do what I can for it. Another question that popped into my head was that she needs to be there for the contempt of court hearings right? What if she doesn't show up? What happens then?

[MixedBag]

Depends on the judge....NYParent's experience (person on the board here) is that the hearing gets rescheduled.
 
BUT the lack of respect by not showing definitely doesn't sit well with any judge.
 
Rescheduled.
 
Default Decision
 
Or heard without her there -- maybe just her attorney there.
 
There is no "one" answer.

[rolo2302]

From what I understood was that for a contempt of court hearing she had to show up there as well. If that's the case and she doesn't show up then what? Jurisdiction is in Idaho and she lives in California and I know for a matter of fact that she can't make it up to Idaho for a court hearing or she just doesn't want to and doesn't think it's necessary.

[MixedBag]

EX#3's EX was the same way -- and it didn't go too well for her in OH.
 
She fled to NV.....
 
"She just doesn't want to and doesn't think it's necessary" -- is more like it.
 
Just keep after what's right and best for your child.
 
 

[MomofTwo]

MB is right...depending on the judge, they may reschedule, allow her attorney to only be present, allow her to attend telephonically, or issue a default response.  Honestly, don't get real excited about this, it's usually just a slap on the wrist for contempt, possibly make up time (and that is wholly dependent on the judge as well) and maybe a more defined method of communication while you are deployed.  It's a baby step.

[rolo2302]

She was the same with the telephone calls when I would call her and she would have to return my calls. I didn't keep track of those because I was leaving soon and didn't find it necessary at the time. So it's not just one thing it's a lot of different things that are just irritating me and just wish I could switch up and have the custody because I know I am more responsible and would be willing to cooperate a lot more.

[NYParent]

As MB stated, my experience has been that BM hasn't shown up to two court hearings.  Both times the hearing has been rescheduled.  On the second no show the judge said that he would personally be ordering BM to be on the third hearing with an attorney (she did not give me a summons).  I'll let you know what happens if she doesn't show up the third time.

Good luck.  I know how hard it is not being able to speak to your children (I am going through that now, it seems to be my punishment for not giving into her demands), although I imagine that it must be much worst while in deployment.

[rolo2302]

NYParent I sent you a private message asking you a few things.

[NYParent]

Rolo- I sent you a PM back.

[rolo2302]

I appreciate everybody that gave me advice through all this. Thank you very much I will keep everybody updated once I get back and start everything.