NCP now has been sanctioned

[greatdad]

OK, so now NCP failed to comply with 2nd motion to compel discovery and has been sanctioned , to no longer be able to submit evidence in final trial end of year.
Also NCP has cancelled last few times in a row of EOW visitation  after I recently succeeeded in getting modification which has her driving further ( inter-state cuz NCP chose to move) and gives no notice. My atty has to check on the visit day, to see and then NCP atty takes hours respond , just  to then say she won't be coming.NCP is claiming no longer has a car. Can we not tell her atty that until NCP can provide a proper schedule that she CAN keep, visitation is suspended, as it is wrong to have little children get prepared to see NCP only to be dissappointed regularly like this ?? Suggestion, comment ?

[mistoffolees]

I think you're asking for trouble if YOU try to cancel visitation for any reason short of imminent harm to the kid(s).

She has the right to see the kids under the terms of the parenting plan. That's her right. If she chooses not to exercise it, it does not wipe out the fact that it's still her right to do it next time.

It's not your job to keep the kids from being disappointed in their mother. In fact, the less you get involved in their relationship with their mother, the better.

It's your job to be there for them if they're sad and be the best parent you can be. What their mother does is not your business (again, unless there's danger of imminent harm). Disappointment with their mother does not meet that standard.

The kids will learn that they can't depend on their mother and will not expect her to be there every week. That's sad, but it's her choice, not yours.

[greatdad]

>I think you're asking for trouble if YOU try to cancel
>visitation for any reason short of imminent harm to the
>kid(s).
>
>She has the right to see the kids under the terms of the
>parenting plan. That's her right.

It is not her "right" , it is an order of the court and it is her legal obligation.You give up your parental rights when you choose to not negotiate privately and allow a Judge to decide things !

 If she chooses not to
>exercise it, it does not wipe out the fact that it's still her
>right to do it next time.
Again, since it is an oblligation determined by court order, she is in violation of that order. amd should not be allowed to continue to violate it with impunity.
>
>It's not your job to keep the kids from being disappointed in
>their mother. In fact, the less you get involved in their
>relationship with their mother, the better.
I agree with this. However since the children have to travel several hours and several hundred miles to the oick up point, it is my job to prevent that trip if the NCP is not going to show. It would be one thing if it was for an infrequent emergency, but NCP isn't even calling to tell me she won't make it. I have had to check with her Atty to find out. It should not be incumbent upon me to call her Atty to see if she intends to comply with court order or not. Transportation is her responsibility and if it is know now, that she won't have any, then what is the point of keeping the visitation order in place. I am saying let's agree to suspend it until such time as NCP obtains transport ( come on you can get an economy car  rental for under $50.00 for the weekend) and can agree on a time to pick up.
>
>It's your job to be there for them if they're sad and be the
>best parent you can be. What their mother does is not your
>business (again, unless there's danger of imminent harm).
>Disappointment with their mother does not meet that standard.
>
>The kids will learn that they can't depend on their mother and
>will not expect her to be there every week. That's sad, but
>it's her choice, not yours.
We agree on this.

[mistoffolees]

>>I think you're asking for trouble if YOU try to cancel
>>visitation for any reason short of imminent harm to the
>>kid(s).
>>
>>She has the right to see the kids under the terms of the
>>parenting plan. That's her right.
>
>It is not her "right" , it is an order of the court and it is
>her legal obligation.You give up your parental rights when you
>choose to not negotiate privately and allow a Judge to decide
>things !
>
> If she chooses not to
>>exercise it, it does not wipe out the fact that it's still
>her
>>right to do it next time.
>Again, since it is an oblligation determined by court order,
>she is in violation of that order. amd should not be allowed
>to continue to violate it with impunity.
>>

I think you're going to find that the judge disagrees with you.

She has been given certain visitation times. Whether she chooses to exercise today's visitation or not has absolutely no impact on future visitation - unless you can convince the judge to change the order. Further, failing to exercise your visitation is not a violation of a court order. The court order says that she CAN visit, but not that she has to.

If you're routinely driving and she's not there, then you have quite reasonable grounds to ask the judge to change the visitation - or make her reimburse you for your travel expense. Under those circumstances, getting a change in the order shouldn't be too hard.

But if you tell her "you didn't exercise your last visitation (or even your last 100 visitations) so I'm not going to allow you to have any more", I'm quite confident that YOU will be the one in trouble with the court, not her.

I would strongly encourage you to check with your attorney before taking this action. I think you're going to be far better off if you ask the judge to make the change rather than trying to take it upon yourself to change a judge's orders.

[greatdad]

No worries. Everything is done via Attorneys. I won't tell her anything, I will ask atty to have NCP atty agree to this or face a show cause if she doesnt show up again. What I am trying to achieve is having NCP agree to not continue to make children have dashed expectations  uneccesarily.
It is not exactly a short trip, and to me it is  abusive of NCP to do this.

As far as having NCP reimburse travel, it would be  a moot point, as  first she would need to start paying the child support she keeps ducking.

[ocean]

Have your lawyer ask hers to tell you when her next visit will be. Have it state "NCP may have two weekends per month as long as she gives you XX of notice"?